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Flicko the very bad light switch

You have to decide. Lie in the dark with Flicko, or flick his snotty red nose to make the lights come on?

PIONEER CLUB: The honest Casino

The famed Pioneer Club lays it on the line in this 1948 gaming guide;

“Maybe you’ll TAKE the SLOT MACHINES… or vice versa!” Nevermind the BS below that about being pleasantly surprised… Vice Versa it is, and by the time you leave, you will be well versed in the vices.

These are the sounds of your life

This was one of those yard sales with dozens of boxes o’crap on tables in the yard, most with no price. They had I think grandma sitting in the carport taking payment. She had no idea what this little box was, pushed the “Yee Haw” button and cracked up.

I lumped it in with all the junk my wife was getting and got it for a measley dollar! (Actually, free- Teresa paid for it)

The grandma asked what it was, I said it was just a little noise box to annoy my wife. I like to press the “fart” button during dinner.

Happy to be playing again

I got caught up in bidding frenzy and wound up buying this old Zenith Trans-Oceanic at the Saturday auction for forty bucks.

I figured to put a kit in that bypasses the old capacitors and the power tube, but no need! It plays perfectly here, at least on AM radio. I haven’t picked up any shortwave, but didn’t try that hard yet.

I found the original manual and schematic tucked inside. It was originally owned by a man named Delbert. Boy, you don’t meet too many Delberts these days. I plan to add a dial light and bluetooth; because that’s what Delbert would want.

Also I’ll run a wire antenna out the window, and stay up late some night, bet it will pull in KGO down in San Francisco, as my Orange GE AM radio did with the wire antenna added, when I was a kid staying up at night listening to KING, KOOL, and KJR battle it out for our hearts and minds.

Fun facts to know and tell

There is something wrong with this, but I can’t quite put my finger on it. Apparently pigs used to brush their teeth with their own hair? The “photomicrographs” make me want a hog bristle toothbrush, it looks like it would get between teeth better than rounded plastic bristles.

Ma pig is just set in her ways.

DO YOUR BEST or I will do my worst

I was in the Cub Scouts a million years ago. Still smarting from my parents selling my train set to pay for the uniform which I did not want to wear anyway.

I think we got on our den mother’s nerves. One time she was driving kids home in her behemoth station wagon, and piped up with, “Let’s play a game! See if you can not make a sound as long as the light is red!” I thought, what a stupid game! There is no skill in it! Anyone can do THAT!

I lost.

Baltic Shoplifter?

I went to the saturday auction by myself yesterday, but I picked up this little figure for Teresa.

Some guy at the auction thought she “looked Lithuanian” but didn’t explain why. I think Russian?

Looks like she has diverticulitis. Also, she appears to be hiding about 30 pounds of kielbasa in her skirt. That’s a clue.

Be the life of the party (until you’re not)

When I was a kid, some comic books would have ads proclaiming that you could “Throw your voice”; as I recall, it strongly implied that I could do things like make my mother think that my sister was talking back to her. Apparently they would send a non-rusty version of this device, and instructions of some sort. But what if someone asked you something? Were you supposed to keep a handkerchief or Kleenex handy to pretend to cough into?

This is some Jeff Dunham level stuff here. That would be most amusing to see what would happen if mom heard Evelyn say “I keeeel you!!” But I would have started cracking up and probably end up with this thing lodged in my trachea.

Our new doorman

Though shall not pa… FLY? What fly?

My parents used to have one of these croaking frog greeters, I think it started to grate on their nerves, so they turned it off, eventually the batteries leaked and it got thrown away.

I guess we got this at the Saturday auction, but I sure don’t remember bidding on it.

Be your own boss! Help people avoid butt splinters!

At first glance, I thought this old magazine ad was suggesting that I should start a career in the exciting world of toilet seat repair. Back then, toilet seats were made of wood, and many were outdoors, so maybe they didn’t hold up as well as today’s plastic or lucite seats.

Still, people were self-sufficient, and could get this stuff in Mount Pilot, or just order it from the Sears catalog. I mean, it’s RIGHT THERE. Unless that page is missing.